Cyprus Mail
Life & Style

Hard to decide amid all the shouting


By Alexia Saleem

My twins are five and a half. I don’t yet know how I feel about the Covid measures introduced last Monday regarding wearing face masks to school and undergoing weekly rapid tests. I am simply relieved that at this point it’s not something I have to address.

I first heard about the new measures 10 days ago when I was with a mum friend who is very opposed to them. I also have a close mum friend who is very in favour of them.

Both have taken to social media with gusto to express their perspectives.

I have also read a few comments underneath news articles on the issue and those too have sometimes been heated and contemptuous.

So how do I feel? I want to say I feel sad, but I’m not sure that’s the right word. I guess I don’t really know how I feel.

In fact, I normally shy away from writing or talking about things that can attract attacks because, frankly, I’d rather not be attacked. Even if I do know it’s never personal and it says everything about the other person.

But in the moment, when I’m caught off guard, I forget that and I get caught up in the drama and feel lost and scared.

Covid is here to stay. I get that. And people are afraid of this virus. I get that also. I also get that people are really scared of the vaccine and its side-effects. And I also get that people don’t want to be controlled and to be dictated to regarding their children.

But what’s sad is the fear. Fear that has polarised people who used to be friends. The vaccinated and the unvaccinated. The mask wearers and the non-mask wearers. And it has become equally shouty on both sides.

Humans love to categorise. We have done it since time began. About skin colour, religion, appearance, money, politics, sexuality and now about the vaccinated and unvaccinated.

And then we take it a step further: we judge and compare. I like this. I don’t like this. This is good. This is bad. I like you. I don’t like you. You are good. You are bad.

When we’ve picked a side, we do everything we can to justify why we’ve picked that side and it’s often very hard to see the other perspective. We all think we have the right answer. We know the truth. And we are so convinced of that truth. So resolute in our beliefs.

FYI I am vaccinated. I did it because I thought it would make life easier. And I suppose, on some level it has. At least I don’t have to do rapid tests ad infinitum.

But getting the vaccine wasn’t a straightforward decision. I had to do a lot of soul searching and meditating first. And then I had to surrender and trust that it was for the greater good. I had to trust that I came into this time/space reality knowing that this would unfold. And I had to trust that whatever the consequences, it would unfold in perfect order as it was always meant to.

Getting to that state didn’t come easily. And I’m not sure how I feel about getting my booster shot in a few months’ time.

I don’t think the vaccine was designed to kill us. Are people profiting from it big time? For sure. Are they trying to kill our kids? I don’t think so.

I believe we are all spiritual beings who have lived many times before. Not everyone shares my beliefs and I’m okay with that. But I also believe that we come here to experience being human and that we have a human mind that can be trapped in fear and ego.

We forget where we came from. We forget the light. I talk about these things with my children. They know what happens to people who are afraid. They know that people lose sight of who they truly are when they turn away from their inner rainbows.

I forget my rainbow all the time. I judge. I feel fear. I criticise myself and others.

I don’t have the answers. I am just trying to surrender and trust. That whatever will unfold will unfold for the greater good.

There will be people who think I’m naïve. And I’m okay with that too. I am choosing to trust that when the time comes, I’ll know what to do. I’m also choosing to trust that if it does come to vaccinating my kids or for them to wear masks, it’ll be for their greater good. That whatever the consequences, it was always meant to be. That this isn’t their first lifetime here and that they’ve come to play the game the way it is currently unfolding. I strongly suspect they are much older and wiser souls than I am. That they have it figured out more than I do.

Living in fear sucks. For me, peace of mind is paramount. And to attain that I must surrender and trust that I’m being guided and that whatever unfolds was always meant to be anyway.

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