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Tales from the Coffeeshop: President as tormented Shakespearian hero

Grivas as president

PREZ NIK’S frenzied efforts to convince the idiots among us that he did everything in his power to solve the Cyprob are without respite. This is the mantra he has been repeating ad nauseam for the last few months, backed by the theatrical pursuit of the resumption of the talks which has a below zero probability of happening.

Why does he care so much? I can only guess that he does not want to go down in history as the prez, who spurned the last great opportunity for a deal and paved the way for two states, which was exactly what he did. He will keep denying this, no matter how difficult it is for words, even for someone as eloquent as he is, to negate actions that were witnessed by everyone.

In his latest attempt to convince, he has taken on the role of tormented Shakespearian hero. In an interview with Greece’s Ta Nea newspaper published on Saturday, he said: “I bear the burden because I am completing my term in the presidency, without achieving the most important target I set, the solution of the Cyprus problem.”

His tragedy is that he will have to live with this heavy burden for the rest of his days, through no fault of his own. This is the unending suffering Turkish intransigence inflicts on our leaders.


IN THE SAME interview Nik said he made “superhuman efforts” to get a settlement with Mustafa Akinci. He has stepped up the scale of his efforts retrospectively. In a previous interview, he claimed that he had done “everything humanly possible to get a settlement”.

Now we know that the earlier statement was not entirely true, as he had done more than what was humanly possible for a settlement. His efforts were “superhuman”, but he avoided mentioning it in case some thought he was exaggerating.

His superhuman efforts are now focused on the resumption of the talks, which he conceded would have to wait until after elections in Kyproulla, Greece and Turkey. He has proposed cooperation between the UN and EU, which could in the meantime prepare a proposal that would constitute a common basis for a settlement.

I hope his fantasy proposal will be implemented and will help lighten the burden he bears.


AN OUTSIDER seeing pictures of the mob gathered outside the legislature on Thursday evening could have been mistaken into thinking it was an election gathering supporting the candidacy of an elderly, beret-wearing gentleman with a moustache.

Why else would the mob be waving flags with headshots of the man if he were not standing in the presidential elections? The outsider would also have concluded that the candidate’s name was Grivas as the mob was chanting, “Grivas is with us and guides us,” and was being backed by a party known as Eoka B with people demanding, “Eoka B strike again.”

Having been dead for close to 50 years, it is a bit difficult for General Grivas to stand in the presidential elections, and even the simpletons entertaining far-right political views who gathered outside the House with banners and flare guns know this. The mob looked more like a football crowd that had taken a wrong turn on the way to the ground and adapted their gig to the new surroundings.

The big question is why there are no groups of football hooligans supporting Makarios?


THE COVID fanatics are busy trying to revive project fear, even if they have changed their story so often nobody seems to be paying them any attention. The other day, epidemiologist and member of the scientific advisory team Dr Michalis Voniats was on CyBC urging people to have the booster vaccine.

He said the increase in cases were people over 65 who had not received the booster shot (fourth shot). In the US, he said it had been documented that people who died were elderly that had three vaccinations but not the booster shot. Are we to deduce from this that people who were unvaccinated were safer than those who had three doses of the vaccine but no booster?

Dr Voniatis probably did not think his scaremongering through in his eagerness to frighten people, especially the elderly, into having the boosters. Three doses of the vaccine now offer no protection to the elderly. How long will it be before booster shot will have to be boosted by another booster shot?


PARENTS’ associations of two schools in Limassol, which have threatened to deprive their children of their education if the education minister did not satisfy their demands for a smaller curriculum and the abolition of the twice-yearly exams, are still waiting for an answer.

The associations, which instructed their kids to boycott classes for one hour last Tuesday, had threatened to close the schools if the minister, Prodromos Prodromou, who is viewed as the antichrist by students, parents and teaching unions, did not respond to their letter of demands by last Friday. Will they shut down the two schools now? Their kids would certainly not be complaining about skiving off school with their parents’ blessing.

Parents do not realise they are being used by lazy kids and lazy teachers. For kids and teachers, a smaller curriculum and exams once a year would mean less work, which is the only thing they really care about.


PERHAPS I am being unfair in saying that all teachers care about is doing less work. They also care a lot about money, and the Disy wing of Poed, the primary teachers’ unions, wasted no time explaining to members how much more moollah they will be getting from January 2023. This is to show how Disy has been looking after the interests of teachers.

These include: increase in everyone’s pay scale which would mean between €100 and €150; increase of 2 per cent on gross income because the cuts of the past are scrapped; 4 per cent increase thanks to CoLA. They gave an example of a teacher with 21 years’ service, whose gross salary is at €3,771 would rise to €4,174 by August when the increments would kick in.

That is more than 10 per cent increase for a 0 per cent increase in productivity. And they teach kids to be lazy and demand less schoolwork as part of their duties.


IN KYPROULLA the lunatics took control of the asylum a long time ago. In the latest manifestation of this, the unions of the Electricity Authority of Cyprus, have decided that they should run the organisation, and if they are not allowed to do so they will cut power to households during the holiday period.

They have decided not to operate the Dhekelia power station, which produces 200MW of power daily, because of its high carbon emissions and not to do any repairs or maintenance work on the power network, if there is not a full complement of workers in a maintenance team. This is because they have decided the EAC must hire 370 workers and become immediately involved in development of RES.

Like the Limassol parents who will close the schools, they will proceed with the power cuts because the energy minister, Natasa Pilides had not responded to a letter they had sent her with all their diktats. Considering the EAC has management and a board of directors, why are the union bosses speaking directly with the minister?

Because they are running the show – the management and board have cosmetic roles – and they want the public to blame the minister when they start cutting power from people’s homes.


THE ANIMAL Party has decided to become subtly involved in the archiepiscopal elections. On Friday the leader of the party Kyriakos Kyriakou (another KK) met unsmiling candidate and Limassol bishop Atahanasios and they decided they would hold a blessing for all animals at Limassol bishopric.

The blessing will take place at 4pm on December 16, the day the church celebrates Saint Modestos, protector of animals. It was not clear whether people could take their pets to the service so they could be blessed individually. Will the blessing also cover rats, cockroaches and poisonous snakes, which are horrible creatures that do not deserve to be blessed.

KK said he handed Athanasios a memo with six points, which the bishop said he would implement even if he were not elected archbishop. My guess is that one of the six points is allowing the faithful to take their pets to church services or at least to have a special service once a week for animals.



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Source: Cyprus News Agency