Tales from the Coffeeshop

THE NEW general-secretary of Pasydy, the public parasites union, Stratis Mattheou seems a much nicer guy than his obnoxiously arrogant predecessor, Glafcos Hadjiklamouris, who believed he owned our Kyproulla and ...

IN THE end, Prez Nik II bowed to public pressure and rather belatedly obeyed the law about the publication of contributors to election campaign. On Thursday, two weeks after the ...

THE SANCTIONS, imposed by the Yanks and Brits during Holy Week on 23 Cypriots and 20 Cyprus-based companies, may have brought the honeymoon period of the new presidency to a premature end ...

A WORD of sympathy for the former permanent secretary of the foreign ministry Kornelios Korneliou, whose humiliating demotion by the new government, has become a popular talking point in the ...

MOKAS, which is known in English as the ‘Unit for Combating Money Laundering,’ is one of those state organs that was set up for the sake of appearances, never really ...

ALTHOUGH our establishment had never been a big fan of our newly-elected prez, its bored members decided that Nikos II should be given a chance before it went into critical ...

HAS NOBODY informed Nikos Christodoulides that the election campaign is over and that he should stop behaving like a presidential candidate and act like the presidente of the Kyproulla republic? ...

THE COMRADES of Akel have never been renowned for their sense of humour, but their description of the council of ministers announced on Monday night by Nikos II was both ...

DISAPPOINTED that the Disy leadership election will not be contested by the good, the bad and the ugly, as had been widely expected, the bad and the ugly having decided ...

THE CANDIDATE our establishment did not endorse, won last Sunday’s run-off election by a relatively comfortable margin of 15,000 votes and in 10 days will be crowned Nikos the Second, to ...

IN THE END Prez Niccolo’s Machiavellian scheming aimed at making his errand boy the heir to his throne, that our establishment wrote about weeks ago, did not go to ...

AFTER a year-long election campaign, we have mercifully reached the final stretch. After today, there will just be another six days left and on the seventh we will have a ...

WHEN last Sunday a Politis opinion poll showed that the lead of Nik’s chosen successor, Nikos the Second, had been cut to five percentage points, his trolls on social ...

PREZ NIK, in his new role as Roman emperor, is not exhibiting the slightest hint of restraint in his intensive legacy-building drive which aims at establishing himself as the greatest ...

ONE OF the main slogans of Ethnarch Junior, when he stood in the presidential elections five years ago, was that he would revive the middle class which he defined as ...

I WAS tempted to wish our customers a happy new year, but in the end I decided against it as I do not think 2023 has the potential to be happy ...

ON THIS Christmas Day, all Christians of Kyproulla, including the non-believers, have been given the best possible present they could have prayed for, even though they would not have found ...

SUPREME ruler of the Dias media empire, Zeus Hadjicostis, I hear from a reliable source, has been on to Akel chief, Stef Stef, trying to persuade him to reach an ...

PREZ NIK’S frenzied efforts to convince the idiots among us that he did everything in his power to solve the Cyprob are without respite. This is the mantra he ...

OUR DEPUTIES go on a three-month holiday having attended the last session of the House on Friday. The legislature will reconvene after the end of the presidential elections, giving deputies ...

FOLLOWING the activities of Prez Nik in the last few weeks, you could easily have been fooled into thinking that he was campaigning for re-election. He is out and about ...

‘MACHIAVELLIAN’ was how one newspaper described the bishops’ wheeler-dealing and plotting, which began as soon as the funeral orations for Archbishop Chrys II were completed, and the battle for his ...

SO FAREWELL Archbishop Chrys II, poor boy from Tala who rose to the top of the Church thanks to his undoubted cunning and wits. Our establishment, like everyone, considers it ...

WHAT HAD been shaping up as an acrimonious divorce, with a custody battle and a legal row over the ownership of the house and furniture, rather disappointingly degenerated into a ...